Posted: Fri Jan 29, 2010 7:39 pm |
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It would be helpful if she could explain to you what was really behind her "change", what underlying reasons / events / changes in life, in the relationship etc...could have caused the changes in her behaviour and in her attitude to the relationship with you... For example, was there anything like a relationship crisis, new stage in life (job, friends, university, new habits, new people, a new guy she may be fascinated by etc...), sexual frustration, disappointnent which could have started the changes?
Unless you know the true answer to this question about the real causes of the changes of her attitude and lifestyle, you can just make some guesses. Probably there has been some unwelcomed change in the structure of her priorities. Or she is taking you for granted and feels that she may act as an "independent" person.
Another question is whether she really doesn´t care about what you do. If she feels that you are not "capable" of doing anything which she might not like, then it could help if she realized that it is not so. You can try being more "independent" as well, you can flirt with girls etc and if she doesn´t mind, then probably she really does not value the relationship... Sometimes people can wake up only if they see that their partner (taken for granted by them) may be desired by someone else and is not so dependent on them. If this may be the case of your girlfriend, you can try this risky step, but nobody knows what the outcomes will be...
Anyway, my personal opinion on relationships is much closer to your ideas than to your girlfriends´ new attitude, so I would say that unless it gets solved somehow I probably wouldn´t be able to find satisfaction from this new "style" of the relationship. It seems just natural to me that partners care about each other, their behaviour, activities, feelings etc... If it reveals that your girlfriend does not share this perspective (or she had it only at the early stages of the relationship), then I would probably try to loosen the emotional bonds with her (one way could be for example starting to be more interested in other girls - sooner or later).
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