My bf and I were together for more than 2 yrs and everything was perfect. We were very happy and got along really well in many ways until 1 mth ago I mentioned to him about marriage idea. I have been talking about this that marriage is what I want at the end from the very beginning and he at that time told me that he didnt reject this idea but he din't see the point why to get marry also. So until 1 mth ago, I talked about this idea again and we had some different opinions and I got really upset and told him that if we didn't hv the same direction then we should break up. He got really scared that he was going to loose me and he told me the real feeling which was he is afraid of marriage because of his parents divorced.

We didn't break up and we saw each other again a week later spent the weekend but after that weekend he told me that he had a strange feeling with me. He didn't know what it is but he didn't feel the same and feel rite. I asked him if he loved me or not and he told he didn't know, I was really upset and was trying to find the answers from him why he felt this way. He wanted me to leave him alone for sometime and let him think of a solution because he realised this was a real issue between us that he had to face.

I controlled myself not to contact him for a week then he called me and told me that he really missed me and wanted to see me, so I met with him and spent a nite and I thought everything was fine again. But then after that he told me he still felt strange with me. He said he was very confused, stuck and lost at the moment, he didnt know what to do with me. I let him know that I wanted to work out with him and save the relationship because I really love him and even tho he wasn't able to tell me he loves me but I know he still feels very strong with me. But at the same time I was upset because he kept telling me he felt strange with me so it was realy hard for me handle. I was very frustrated and asked him if he wanted to continue or not and he said he thinks maybe we should not continue. But he said it is very hard for him also because he didn't want to lose me. I was devastated to hear that he wanted to end with me but he said he still wants to keep contact with me and be friends. I told him I am not sure if I can do it.

And so since we last met 3 days ago, I was very very sad but I decided not to contact him at least for a mth and let him and I cool down to think clearly. I felt better this way cos I tried to forget all this and let the time tell the truth for us. Yesterday he sent me sms and just to see how was I and I replied. And today he called me and also just made some small talks and then I told him I have to go and didnt call him back. I felt sad again after talking with him cos I really love him but I don't know what he wants. I already told him before that I wanted to stay with him even tho he doesnt want to get marry but he didn't accept and he thinks this would still be an issue between us.

Why he still wants to stay contact with me if he doesn't want to work on the relationship with me? I don't want to be friends cos its too painful to do it. Can someone tell me what he wants from me??

so sad and afraid to lose him.